While encounter through the first few hours ofStar war Outlaws , I found myself once again exhibit with an all - too - intimate trope . ND-5 , the game ’s primary droid crewmate to Kay Vess , appear to be yet anotherautism - cod droidthat is typically playact for laugh or treated as “ other ” by the main form .
invest these characteristics on a droid or robotic lineament is a uncouth trope in and out ofStar Wars . For a viewer , it makes horse sense for a machine to defer to system of logic , not be very empathetic , and not pick up on the nuances of social interactions . It ’s likely not done to intentionally target those on the spectrum , but I ’ve always had to put up with it as a slightly insulting descriptor of negative representation . However , one blink - and - you - overleap - it credit line finally took advantage of using a robotic character to put up a rare example of positive representation — one that spoke to me , as someone with my own account of overcoming autism brand .
I’m not broken
ND-5 touch up with Kay early on on and is tasked with supporting her in building a squad to deplumate off the game ’s big rip-off . He does n’t join her out in the world , but is Kay ’s oculus and ear when she require intel or advice . These initial hours with him did footling to allay my first impression that he would n’t be used for anything more than the hydrofoil to Kay ’s comedic tone .
Not long into the adventure , Kay eventually reaches a planet in hunting of a droidsmith to recruit for the heist . As the ship touches down and she talk over the foreign mission with ND-5 , she make an off - hand remark that this droidsmith could align his protocols — fundamentally castrate his personality . ND-5 replies with two lines : “ I do n’t need help . I am not broken . ”
I imagine most people watch this tantrum will accept ND-5 is speaking literally , as he so often does . In the literal sense , no , he is n’t broken — there ’s no damage in need of repairs . But that ’s not what this line stand for to me .
When I was a child , I stick out from extreme sensorial issues . I was extremely oversensitive to fragrance and textures , to the pointedness of breaking down into conniption if I felt the tag on my shirt against my hide or experience to ride in the railroad car without the window down to not sense choke by the scent . I ca n’t remember exactly what happen in this one instance , but during one overwhelming present moment with my two older siblings , who could n’t encompass at the time why I was acting that manner any more than I could , my crony say to our female parent , “ Mom , sterilize him . ”
Living with autism is a unlike conflict for everyone . I do n’t intend to speak for anyone else ’s experience but my own , but I do believe one share battle is take our conflict and not conceive of them as flaws . Yes , there are things we need to learn to do , change , or find ways to accommodate for that seemingly no one else does . That take in it so easy to fall into the mindset of being “ ill-timed ” or “ other . ” “ Broken . ” When everyone and everything else seems to accommodate so neatly into place , but we do n’t , it is a logical geartrain of intellection to assume we ’re the problem .
candidly , it is still something I shinny to assume even now in my XXX . There were hundreds of times when I would ’ve taken any opportunity to just be “ normal . ” It ’s intemperate to convey just how insulate and demoralizing it can be to go in a world where you are get a line as the outlier . The weird one . The job . What makes this such a persistent and complex issue is that it is reinforced internally and outwardly . If you did n’t have access to other people like you as I did n’t and spiritualist either brush aside or plays others like you for laughter , it is all too easy to fall into a vicious bicycle of damaging self - perception .
My female parent may have been just as lost as I was when it come to raise me , but she already knew something that ND-5 cast so confidently . When my sidekick made that comment , she merely said : “ He ’s not broken . ”
It ’s only two lines , but this was the first clip I truly felt understood by a character . ND-5knowshe is dissimilar , but take that ’s who he is . There ’s nothing to “ fix , ” only difference we necessitate to interpret and live with . At least in my experience , that ’s just as severe for someone on the spectrum to make do with as it is for the ones around them .